Sunday, 05 September 2010
-
my mom wants a restraining order on my bf
my mom is a very worrisome mother. last night i went to dinner with my bf. she didn't know where i was. my phone was in my purse and i didn't hear it ring/vibrate and she tried calling me for an hour. she eventually found me at the restaurant and started freaking out. she tapped my head ( not hard, like a friend would do) and called me a stupid bitch for not picking up my phone. she said she was really worried and scared i was dead. she is very impulsive when it comes to me and my safety. my boyfriend got really mad at how my mom acted and this morning he sent her a threatening and verbally abusive text calling her a cunt and a psychopath and saying he would call the police if she ever went to his house.
i'm very torn at this point. i think he's abusive for getting involved and writing such a horrible text to my mom. they have already had problems in the past, but he has never written a text like this before to her. ( he has though to one of my friends who wasn't nice to me, and an ex). he says he's trying to protect me but i still don't think that is the way to do it. my mom says if i see him again she will call the police and get a restraining order. i'm very mad at him but i want to talk it over. i don't know if that is a good idea or not. my mom thinks he can get worse as he gets older, and could become more violent.
any advice would really help!
thanks!
-
recommend
- recs 0
-
email
- sent 0
- like
Related Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to chicagogirl's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in chicagogirl's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
Comments (4)
Imo, I think both were wrong and they handle the situation very poorly.
Before you went out with your boyfriend, did you tell your mom who and where you were going with your boyfriend? And btw, how old are you?!
If you didn't tell your mom you went out with your boyfriend, I get the part where she was concern but I think she overreacted. She shouldn't had called you a "stupid bitch" but sit down with you at a neutral time and voice out her concerns.
I also understand that your boyfriend wanted to "protect" you but how he handled the situation, again, was very poorly. Instead of threatening and insulting your mother, he should of apologized for taking you out and worrying her then voice out his concern that though he understands where your mom is coming from, insulting you in front of him is unappreciative and disrespectful and he would appreciate it if she would use other "appropriate" words to address the way she feels next time.
Over all, I feel that you should just talk to each of them individually and tell them how you feel about the situation and try to work something out.
@jeezshoua@xanga -
I'm
almost 21. I didn't tell her where i was going which was stupid of me.
but i do that often and it hasn't been a problem. my parents know i
always go out with my bf often, and that we don't go far from home
anyway. i was literally a block away from the house at a restaurant. i
did tell my dad i was going out to dinner that night but then i think
he wasn't as convincing to my mom that i really did go to dinner,
because i guess he still wasn't so sure.
i did have a talk with
my mom and bf, and he does regret his choice of words but he still
talks badly about my mom. i also spoke with my mom and she knows she
needs to calm down but she doesn't think what he did back to her is
justified at all. so he's not allowed at the house at all now. i'm
worried about our relationship. i'm mad that he isn't really seeing
that it's his fault he can't come over because of his impulsive
behavior. i'm also afraid how will my life be with him if things get
even more serious than they are and my family won't be around. he's
told his parents about how my mom reacted and they don't want him
around my house either. but of course he hasn't showed them the text he
wrote.
i think things can get better. my mom and him have had
problems before and have gotten better, but this really is the worst of
it all and my mom is very concerned and thinks i don't have boundaries
with him at all and it can get worse.
After reading the last couple of posts, I think that your boyfriend is not someone you should waste your time with. He has no respect for you and your relationship is only going to get worse. It will eventually lead to a really bad breakup because you'll realize that despite whatever feelings of love you have for him, you won't be happy. He won't make you happy because he doesn't care to.
-ray leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I read a little bit of your recent entries, and I say GET OUT. I know that youre probably thinking "well I wrote about bad stuff so everyone sees the bad sides of him and not the great stuff that I see in him everyday..." but the bad stuff is BAD. If you continue this relationship everything will get worse and you will wind up miserable. he sounds dangerous even. I usually don't give advice to people I don't know, especially about situations I don't know all the details about it, but I say get out. Get out now and find someone who's sane.